What passes for normal around here

Now that we're over a week past due, I've sort of settled into this "well, I guess this is how it's gonna be" mode -- as if, y'know, I'm just gonna be pregnant forever, so I might as well get used to it. Thing is, it's some weird stuff I'm getting used to. I wanted to write out how it feels, not to complain, but to try and describe the weirdness. There's so much about being pregnant that they DON'T tell you until it's TOO LATE! 1) My hands hurt. All of my knuckles and joints and wrists ache, especially when I wake up in the middle of the night and haven't been moving. I can't grip anything tightly, which means M has to open those pesky jars of peanut butter and such and I feel like a wuss. It's weird. I literally can't get a grip. 2) Did you know how much you use your legs when turning over in bed? It's true. I can't roll from one side to the other now without using my arms, because my legs just gave up a few weeks ago. To be blunt, I feel rather bowlegged and like I've been trail riding for a few months. Yee-HAW!!! 3) Lower back aches kinda all the time, like i've been pushing a wheelbarrow full of rocks uphill all day long. Same with hamstrings. Come to think of it, this could be good training for a 3rd-down specialist running back. 4) Mild stabby-stabby feelings in the nether regions. That's all I'll say about that. 5) My hands fall asleep in the middle of the night, depending on which side I"m sleeping on. I think a nerve's getting pinched in my shoulder. I miss the days of sleeping on my tummy. 6.) I can no longer sit in a ladylike fashion. Mostly I sit like Buddha (if Buddha were a beer-drinking VFW ho-bag wearing scruffy gym shorts and a giant Chick Creative t-shirt). 7) My toes? So very far away. Okay, that seems like a litany of complaints, but I mean it as a List of Oddities. 'Cuz I'm mostly used to it all by now, and relatively willing to accept it. We go to the doctor today (yay! my real doc is back!) and honestly, if she said, "Let's have that baby tomorrow!" my reaction might well be "huh? I'm supposed to have a baby? You mean it's not normal to have a loveseat grafted onto my belly? Cuz I've kinda got the room decorated around it by now..." Also: Yesterday was my 37th birthday. I have the most wonderful pancake-making husband on the planet, and if I write any more about how much he rocks, you will all know what morning sickness feels like.